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We’re actually still trying to work out who Kim Kardashian is. In the meantime, let’s look at this magazine cover.

Horrible door.

Which English actor who we already have a major crush on has a bottom like this?

Cheryl and Ashley are finally divorced. The world stops moving, like in that show FlashForward that was on Channel Five, ergo, nobody watched it.

And the Marc Jacobs award for Never Knowingly Appearing in a Photograph With a Shirt On Goes To… (rustle, rustle of envelope being opened) Jake Shears!

Who lives *pause* in a house like this? Clue: She is the size of a cuckoo clock and sings like a dishwasher

Suck that belly in, bitch!

The Daily Cunt asks the questions…

Please note the following things about talented journalist and general waste of human skin, Peaches Geldof

2.5 million British men are too fat to see their penis

These are people from Glee in The Simpsons. Pop will eat itself? It already has and has thrown itself up in the bathroom

Gay Olympic diver tells gay footballers to come out. And he’ll open the towel if you do!

What does 20-year-old model (we’ll be the judge of that) Nick Gruber see in 67-year-old multi-millionaire fashion designer Calvin Klein?

‘No models or celebs. Just you!’ Oh, not that old ‘real women’ chestnut again!

Never mind that there have always been rumours about William Hague being gay, he is most definitely not having a relationship with this young assissystant

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