‘West End star (we’ll be the judge of that) Ronan Keating wants theatre’s front row moved back over fan mob fears’

Sweetie, no!
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Look at this highly hilarious spoof interview between James Franco and Zac Efron. Aren’t famous people hilarious!

We don’t know about you, but we have fake laugh with James Franco and Zac Efron’s names all over it.

ps.

Sweetie, no!

 

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Now obvs we don’t condone violence towards women – not even Kylie Minogue! – but which of these would you rather give a hearty slap? (We know Bieber’s not a woman, but he is a cunt.)

Myleene Klass looking like a right cunt Justin Bieber looking like a right cunt

This is the hardest decision known to gay. We think it might be a matter for Question Time.

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Josh Duhamel in a wetsuit. Ignore the baby, they get more than enough airtime.

Josh Duhamel in a wetsuit. Ignore the baby, they get more than enough airtime.

Doesn’t look like an awful lot going on in the penis area or thereabouts, but he’s a multi-millionaire so just how many fucks do you think he gives? Besides, we all know how a wetsuit has a habit of flattening, like so.

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A small dog in a teddy bear outfit hits the treadmill. That is all.

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Jake Quickenden in his nude

Grow up!

How can someone so cute be such an irritant? Is it the ridiculous tattoos? A heart around your nipple? Seriously?

Or is it the fact that he is convinced of his attractiveness to such an extent that it actually starts to cancel out that attractiveness? Whatever it is, he is working our reserve nerve on I’m A Celebrity… Get Ant ‘n’ Dec Out of There!

Anyways, here he is with some, erm, rings for Cosmopolitan magazine and cancer and stuff. Oh and he says he has a small penis. Doesn’t matter. He’s clearly a total bottom anyway. A big, fat, tired, lazy, irritating one.

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Who wants to see the trailer for the new Jurassic Park movie? *screams*

Doesn’t seem like much of a re-brand, following the previous disaster, does it? From Jurassic Park to Jurassic World, but someone will buy it. Oh, and aren’t people getting more attractive. Now, Chris Pratt is a scientist!

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No, actually, this is the new fragrance for the twat in your life…

Seriously?

It’s called Reincarnation and the campaign is by Karl Lagerfeild and it features Pharrell and Cara Delevigne. Who sings!

There is a teaser trailer for the advert. But we wouldn’t insult your intelligence. Suffice to say, this is what they look like in it.

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