Fag Hag Diary


She’s back off her hols…

Ooh, in't she brown?

Momma’s home, darlings! Just got back to London after a fabulous week in the South of France marred only by the revelation that I am now apparently a ‘madame’ rather than a ‘mademoiselle’! How much Botox does a girl have to endure for God’s sake before she can regain her rightful ‘mademoiselle’ status?

Anyway, while sitting on a gorgeous Riviera beach with my straight Fag Hag holiday companions, the subject of my fag-haggery came up. ‘Why do you get on so well with gay men?’ said Fag Hag Holiday Companion 1. ‘Is it because you’re a diva?’ ‘No, surely not’, I said, snapping my fingers imperiously in the waiter’s direction for a drink refill. ‘Is it because you’re bitchy?’ said Fag Hag Holiday Companion 2. ‘Mais non!’ I snapped, before noticing an octagenarian with a 28-year-old Japanese woman and remarking that someone round here’s getting paid by the hour. ‘Do you think it’s because there’s something brittle yet vulnerable about me, a la Judy Garland?’ I wondered aloud. And then the real reason that gay men and I get along so well hit me later that night in a flash of light. Of course, it was staring me in the face all along. Why hadn’t I realised it? ‘It’s because I’m fabulous!’ Love it when a mystery gets solved…

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One comment to “Fag Hag Diary”

  1. Welcome back, fagster!

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