Fag Hag Diary


And FH has a run-in with that cute one off Ugly Betty

Oh, hello! 

The Fag Hag is still recovering from her fabulous night out this week at the Glamour Women of the Year Awards… naturally the most glamorous woman of the night was moi, a fact that was criminally overlooked by the judges, but it was most entertaining all the same.

Here are my top five moments from the night when lots of ladies in Fake Bake and tit-tape gathered in a tent…

1) Watching Kim Cattrall walk up to collect her award in full-on silver foil number (very ‘for mash get Smash’)… and  then fall arse over tit on the way up to the stage. The room full of Fake Bake ladies gasped, Jonathan Ross the presenter looked concerned and rushed gallantly to her aid but Kim just drawled in a fabulously Samantha way, ‘And I haven’t even had a drink yet…’

2) Enrique Iglesias in baseball cap and hoodie (why ambassador, you are spoiling us with all this effort) announcing that the winner was ‘Fernie Cotone’. Even ‘Fernie’ had the good grace to admit, ‘Love Henrique pretending he knows who I am’.

3) Lady Vicky Beckham brushing right past me in them pants looking v thin – think seven-year-old boy on a drip in Lagerfeld.

4) Sienna Miller looking like she’d been guzzling from the bottle marked ‘Alcohol’ and gushing stupidly about new co-star Matthew Rhys – ain’t platonic friendship grand…

5) And finally, Fag herself getting introduced to the fit-as-fuck fella from Ugly Betty who plays Daniel… we exchanged mega-watt grins, I plumped up my cleavage and went in for the kill, only to be cock-blocked by some idiot man there to drive the celebrities trying to hit on me.
‘So, you is hot, what do you do then?’ Avoid you is what I do, honey. By which time Daniel had been whisked away by some Fake Bakes. And I wanted to kill that meathead. Although, if we’re honest, Daniel did have hair dyed a rather unfortunate shade of ‘psychic black’ up close…

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4 comments to “Fag Hag Diary”

  1. […] Meanwhile, in other Spicerage news, Fag Hag has this verdict on that outfit Posh her verily self was ‘wearing’ at the Glamour Awards this very week. *We’ll be the judge of that, thank you. […]

  2. Eh? I think you’ll find it’s Alan Dale who is the cute one off of Ugly Betty … AND I FUCKING WOULD LOVE TO, FOR DAYS AND DAYS :-)
    (PS: Where has the humour gone from Boyz? It went good for a few months, and is now as bland as ever)

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  3. Coz the people who used to do Boyz – when it was good – don’t do it anymore. But they do this. Isn’t it.

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  4. Yeah, but can you get me a date with Alan Dale?

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