Fag Hag Diary


When it comes to sex, Thierry Henry ‘n’ missus (and everyone else, for that matter) should take a leaf out of the gay book, says FH.

FAFF (Fit As Fuck Footballer)

So Thierry Henry, the fit as fuck one who I used to love seeing up the Arse, has apparently walked out on wife and bebe with the words, ‘I need to get away from everything English, including my wife’.

Who knows what little dramas were secretly being played out behind the closed Conran shop blinds of their Hampstead pad but whenever words like ‘Mobile phone photos’ and ‘text messages’ are being whispered about in the reasons for split, you don’t have to be Detective Inspector Forbes – Maggie Forbes (remember her off of The Gentle Touch?) to work out someone’s possibly been pulling their pants down in strange places.

You see when most men get married – it’s not just the triumph of hope over experience – it’s downright insane. Men like putting their pee-pees in new, exciting, interesting places – something la gays realise and base their relationships around and yet straight people continue to deny in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary.

A male friend of mine tells a great anecdote about a supermodel walking into a party, and all male eyes turning to her. One guy says, ‘She’s the most beautiful woman in the world’, and his pal replies, ‘Yup, and somewhere there’s some guy, already getting sick of her’. If only more women realised that the world would be one big Hampstead Heath and we’d all get along just fine…

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One comment to “Fag Hag Diary”

  1. Ne’er a truer word was said, Hagster.

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