First she was pregnant, then she miscarried, then – after further examination withinside of her vagina – it was found there was a small human child in there after all (and a fridge freezer, some keys and that tree she cut down that the council wouldn’t take away).
And there’s a quote from Max Clifford and everything!
‘After further examination (they sent some pot-holers in) it has been revealed that Kerry Katona is still pregnant,’ says he. ‘Kerry went back into hospital for a medical procedure last night (we’re saying nothing). However, a blood test revealed surprising results – her pregnancy hormones had gone up not down.’
She then got carted off for a scan and there was found to be the heart-beat of a human being inside her. Obviously not her own, it was deduced that there might be a passing homeless in there or even a baby. Turned out it was a baby.
She and Mark are said to be ‘ecstatic’. So he’s still up to his old tricks.
Here follows an artist’s impression of Kerry Katona’s vagina.