What it is, is… while Harry Potter actor Daniel Radcliffe goes to Broadway to get his front bottom out (knobbly and a bit mushroom-like, we hear from our man in the front row. With opera glasses) in Equus, a touring production to hit every flea-bitten regional theatre in the UK will feature the penis (and presumably the rest of the body) of Lily Allen’s baby brother Alfie (can we talk about these names, by the way? Lily and Alfie! What is this? Upstairs Downstairs?)
That’s him in the picture (very nice and a very respectable 22, so you don’t have to feel guilty like you did about teenage Dan) and he’ll be starring with Daniel’s co-star, Laura O’Toole, who ended up bumming him (or whatever it is these theatricals do in the privacy of their own bedrooms).
They’re just starting rehearsals so his naked ass hasn’t hit the stage yet but if you’re interested he was in Atonement and will be in the up-coming (and highly hotly awaited in these parts) The Other Boleyn Girl.
And they all lived happily ever after.