What’s this? Has someone outed Ricky Martin off-of lady?
Let’s look at the evidence (straight from the real life gob of some gennelman called Ole Henriksen, who’s Ricky’s ‘aesthetician’. What the fuck’s an ‘aesthetician’? Honey, you’re a beauty therapist like the rest of ’em. Tsssssk. Anways, this Ole person was asked who he’d like to spend Santymas with. This was his answer [NB. Why would anyone care?]):
‘I’d go for Stig Tofting (former Danish football player, ‘parently), but since he’s straight, I’d say my client Ricky Martin.’
*gasps from the audience*
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, suckers! Literally. Probably. Maybe.
The end. It was fun, though, wasn’t it. Let’s do it all again very soon.
Now let’s look at Ricky Martin in his teeny tiny trunks…