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Whose celebrity penage-in-a-panty is this dot-dot-dot question mark

Whose could it be? 

The above section of a famous, containing upper legs, bit o’ belly and the gennelman in question’s real life schlong, may or may not or may (again) make you want to touch yourself.

But who? No really, WHO? Find out, after the break… (‘Citing, isn’t it?) (more…)

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‘Ooh, is it that time of the month already and we’ve still not had a sing-song?’

Hoo's the daddy

And today, to celebrate their triumph at the NME Awards we will be mostly sing-songing along to ‘Goodbye Mr. A’ (which we find reminiscent of ELO) by The Hoosiers. A fun video with sexy boys is over the jump, and you can’t say fairer than that… (more…)

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Fag Hag Diary

Faggy darling


The Fag Hag j’adores Duffy. Je really do. In fact, Murrh-eer-eer-eer-ceee is being permanently blasted out of her little ipodetta whilst she struts down the street in manner of girl from Ipanema (if girl from Ipanema came from Crouch End, was carrying a Tesco Metro bag and wearing an Ugg). But Duffy dearest, the whole Jane Austen downcast eyes thing is getting a liddle bit crappy in panties. Call the police there’s a madman around and he’s working in marketing!

Because (more…)

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Who lives in a house like this dot-dot-dot? Okay, it’s a picture of a wicker chair. Who lives on a wicker chair like this dot-dot-dot? If you look closely, you can actually see the famous in question ON their wicker chair. How excitement.

Ooooh, comfy.

This is the patio of a famous. It’s the patio of a house of a famous that is now up for-to buy. It’s in Australia-land, has sea views, is not lived in by said famous ’cause said famous lives in London’s glittering London, has a price tag of two million Australian dollars which is around 30 English pence what with the favourable exchange rate, and it currently belongs to Kylie Minogue. Can you guess to which famous this house currently belongs?

*sets up premium rate phone line; offers three possible answers (Kylie Minogue, Dannii Minogue, Mary Queen of Scots); already offers the prize of three golden coins and a whistle to friend but keeps the phone lines open anyway; buys a new kitchen-cum-diner with the proceeds*

Answer after Jumpy… (more…)

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Oh how we laughed at this GMTV :-(-ness

Happy days.

This was the moment Honey Monster proposed to her husband, kebab-man from somewhere-off-the-Holloway-Road, on GMTV this morrow.

The latter is palpably in the relationship out of sympathy, and is gonna go shit-crazy when he get her indoors back indoors.

We especially enjoyed the following dialogue between presenter personage and Honey Monster: 

Presenter personage: ‘You’ve been with him seven years – why don’t you think he’s ever asked you to marry him?’

Honey Monster: ‘He’s been doing DIY.’


Enjoy it in moving pictures after Jumpy… (more…)

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Gwen on V.


Hello. This is Gwen Stefani on V magazine. She looks hot to trot. And like Madonna year before last.

And after the break she’s wearing Nana’s headscarf and looking not too dissimilar to Karen Elson off-of superdupermodelettedom… (more…)

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Nadine Coyle’s going out with Josh Hartnett. Neither are we.

Get off me!

Nadine Coyle – who has the sort of accent that strips wallpaper. And the skin off small children – is apparently going out with Josh Hartnett.

Josh has recently been linked with Kirsten Dunst, Rihanna, inexplicable-supermodel Agyness Deyn, Rumer ‘Shit, the genes skipped a generation’ Willis, Helena Christensen and Diana Ross and all the Supremes.

Imagine the scene: Office of Nadine Coyle’s PR; ‘group meeting’ over a Pret buffet; topic = Get Nadine A Profile In The States, Ongoing’; work experience sporting this month’s fringe desperate to be noticed; brain storm commences; workie – or Tilly, as they’re affectionately known in some quarters – has a ‘idea’; someone makes a call to someone else; Nadine has a new boyfriend; Tilly becomes a megastar and is seen at all the right meetings.

Rumour has it Josh Hartnett’s next girlfriend will be Ann Boleyn.

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Isn’t it about time this tired old magazine called it a day?

Not Much Education

What kind of world is it, readers, when The Hoosiers – maybe the only decent band around at the moment – are voted Worst Band, Kylie Minogue – possibly the biggest trout around right now – is voted Sexiest Woman, Pete Doherty – the dirtiest, most unpleasant and most ridiculous man to record a record since Shane McGowan – gets Hero of the Year and both Mika and The Hoosiers are banned from attending?

The kind of world it is is NME world, where grown men wear teenagers’ jeans, Peaches Geldof, Kelly Osbourne and Kimberley Stewart (now that’s integrity!) are welcomed as a guests of honour, people not only put up with but give awards to the likes of Arctic Monkeys and where Amy Winehouse is ridiculed as the Worst Dressed woman in pop.

The magazine – down 12% year-on-year, btw, and still sending out journalists who brag they ‘don’t know nuffing’ (don’t be fooled by the accents; they all went to public school) about David Bowie, held its ‘let’s all be really naughty boys’ awards yesterday: sponsored by Shockwaves, by the way, the really cutting edge product from a major manufacturer to make your hair stand on end, you know, like the punks in the 70s. Sorry, we were forgetting, if you don’t know who David Bowie is you won’t know about punk.

Triumphant was Kate Nash (so she’s OK and Amy’s not – funny old world), The Enemy and Manic Street Preachers. And George Bush was Villain of the Year, so no marks for originality either.

Grow up people. And get a hair cut.

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