Ahh, ain’t love grand? The hobos with highlights (aka Sienna ‘sorry treacle, not-quite-special-’nuff-for-moviefilms’ Miller and her hunky dreamboat of a balding, sparrow-legged chain-smoker from Cardiff) have apparently been caught frolicking around in the posh people’s section of the plane!
The duo were ‘kissing noisily and even snuck into the same bed’ said an old nana who knows someone whose son-in-law nearly bought a ticket for that flight had the website not crashed because of the online bingo window playing up.
Well of course they were, my darlings. They’re so fabulously glamorous and they just don’t care! But in my opinion plane hanky panky is seriously over-rated. Everything simply reeks of smelly antiseptic blanket, no one looks their best and there’s always some obese man snoring behind you.
And as for the Mile High Club? What, you just fucked in a chemical toilet – rock ‘n’ roll!