Oh bollocks, we almost forgot to tell you about our new gaff. How remiss of us.

Just somewhere for the weekend.

So it’s in TriBeCa, London’s glittering NYC, and it’s in a new development called Five Franklin Place (it’s at 5 Franklin Place. Don’t tell anyone) and it’s designed by that nice Dutch man, Ben van Berkel, who works for UNStudio. He’s good, he is. 

It’s all very spesh. To be honest we haven’t decided whether to go for one of the penthouses – that’s one o’ them up there – or something more modest like a duplex loft or something. Either way, it’ll do. 

If you yourself fancy one, get rummaging under your dirty bed for any spare coppers you may have; bag ’em up; get ’em down Sainsberries and weigh them in that funny machine they have; get the much more managable note equivalent, and if it comes to anywhere between the figures of $2million and $16million, then you’re sorted. Bargainous.

Take a tour round our slash perhaps-your new pied a terre after the break…

Call that 'architecturally designed'? Tsk. You could swing a cat in there. View's a bit shit... Standards in bathrooms are SO slipping...

Go on, buy one. BUY ONE BUY ONE BUY ONE BUY ONE BUY ONE…

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More dolly #content:

6 comments to “Oh bollocks, we almost forgot to tell you about our new gaff. How remiss of us.”

  1. Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh.

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  2. I like the bathroom. I’m really into bathrooms.

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  3. Those windows will be a bugger to clean.

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  4. There are two Empire State Buildings…. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!
    Oh, it’s a mirror.
    Soz.

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  5. Already got one, thanks.

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  6. Excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me. I think you’ll find this is my apartment.

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