Heinz have withdrawn that nice ad with two men kissing after being pussy-whipped by a bunch* of retards.

Two men kissing is HOT.

*200 of them, in fact. That’s how many people have complained to Heinz about their ad for mayonnaise, in which a New York deli man replaces ‘Mum’ in a traditional Englisher household. At the end of the ad, he asks his ‘husband’ not to forget to give him a (nano-second) kiss on the lips before he heads off to work.

But apparently, two men kissing is ‘offensive’, ‘inappropriate’ and ‘unsuitable to be seen by children’. And some parents were apparently upset that they had to explain same-sex relationships to youngsters. Well get with the program, people – there are gays in this world. Just as there are cunts in this world. And word up – your children just may turn out to be some of them. Gays or cunts, that is.

This is what Nigel Dickie – the mouthpiece for the pussy-whipped Heinz people – had to say on the matter:

‘We apologise to anyone who felt offended. It is our policy to listen to consumers. We recognise that some consumers raised concern over the content of the ad and this prompted our decision to withdraw it.’

So….. *does the math* If Heinz listens to the people and 200 of them complained resulting in the ad’s withdrawel, surely all it would take would be 200 – maybe 201 – people to counter-complain, point out to Heinz how utterly offensive it is to anyone who isn’t a cunt that the ad was withdrawn in the first place, then according to our calculations they’ll start playing the ad again?

You know what you have to do. This is the place to do it.

Power to the (non-retarded) people! Hooray!

Oh yeah, and this is the ‘offensive’ ad it its entirety. Yum.

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More dolly #content:

16 comments to “Heinz have withdrawn that nice ad with two men kissing after being pussy-whipped by a bunch* of retards.”

  1. Heinz, you are BAD people.

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  2. Oh dear, Heinz. I see what you’re doing here – a whole load of publicity, but at the expense of exposing yourselves as homophobic losers? Nice people. I ain’t buying Heinz stuff again. The Sainsbury’s equivalent will do just fine.

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  3. This is the contact page on the Heinz UK site:

    http://www.heinz.co.uk/content/talk_to_us.aspx

    The ad is British, so the American site won’t have much to do with it

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  4. Thanks Kelly!

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  5. How depressing that a small minority of bigots can still change the world.

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  6. Absolutely, Betty – OK, Heinz see it as good publicity, I’m sure, but how offensive is it to us gays that apparently we’re not ‘suitable’ to be seen in an advert for something as ordinary as mayonnaise!

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  7. Exactly. It’s the equivalent of upholding complaints about two black people kissing or two Jewish people kissing – ie. absolutely despicable bigotry. People who think like this shouldn’t even be given credence, let alone have their idiotic, disgusting views upheld by a company such as Heinz.

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  8. I feel sorry for the complainers’ children – can you imagine what poison they’re shoving down their kids’ throats?

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  9. What is also worth mentioning is that the ad didn’t actually portray two hot young studs in a real gay relationship – one was actually still supposed to be the mother of the family. They showed two men kissing under the proviso that we were meant to believe it was actually a ‘normal’ family and then they still get complaints by cuntish wankers. Ooh, I got a bit carried away then. I will now head to Tesco and fill all Heinz products with my gay semen.

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  10. Hahaha! Oh Pilar – I like your light relief at the end. Literally.

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  11. Update: Stonewall have now called for a boycott of all Heinz produce. I for one resisted buying Heinz Salad Cream today, for this very reason. I felt very good about myself.

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  12. I emailed. Told them of my disgust, blah, blah, etc. I also asked that they donate to a charity that supports victims of homophobic abuse as a way to make amends for their stupidity. Kids around the country are going to get bashed and tormented when the kids of those bigots who got this ad pulled use the media coverage as an excuse. It always happens when homophobia is legitimised – assaults go up.

    If heinz care enough about the effect seeing two guys kissing has on the kids of narrow minded people to ditch their ad, then they can bloody well extend their ‘concern’ in the form of ca$h to the gay kids who will suffer cos Heinz bowed to homophobic pressure.

    I think my rant is over now. I’ll have a brisk lie down and listen to some Mantovani to get myself through.

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  13. Just sent em a message on their website – everyone should do this!

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  14. over it! tired of the biggots. My letter to Heinz:
    As a gay person who has always purchased and used your products, I am disappointed that you find me and my family a reason to apologise. Since I offend your consumers so much, I’m sure you won’t mind losing my offensive business.

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  15. You gays make me proud… :-)

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  16. Let them hear us! write an email to pressoffice@uk.hjheinz.com with copy to butlerc@amvbbdo.com, Ted.Smyth@us.hjheinz.com, Nigel.Dickie@uk.hjheinz.com and Consumer.Contact@uk.hjheinz.com

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