Fag Hag niece was lecturing me over lunch the other day on the perils of alcohol.
‘I hate it when grown ups drink wine,’ she sighed with the world weariness of a fiftysomething Glaswegian landlady. ‘Why’s that darling?’ I answered, deciding to hastily change my drink order from Pinot Grigio to a Mojito, (‘a lovely lemonade party drink that Hannah Montana likes’.)
‘Well,’ said Mimi pondering this, ‘it makes them stupid. And they fall over. And they talk loudly. And they make me do voices and impressions. And they look well… ugly.’
Alcohol makes you look ugly? Now could you possibly beat that for a government ad campaign?