Fag Hag Diary

Dish it, baby, dish it! Monday

Oh dear Christophina Ciccone, what  a nastee, trashee, sleazee (OK, Beyonce, calm down, dear…) naughty boy you are!

I mean as if poor old Lady Madonna hasn’t got enough to worry about what with that miserable dud of a husband on a permanent gap year, and that baseball man with a vast neck and scary blue contact lenses sniffing around, and a sudden penchant for an M&S nana slip worn as outerwear.

And were you really expecting honest, god-fearing Fag Hags like myself to spend their Sunday devouring your tawdry tell-all with the naked greed of Peaches Geldof on a shoplifting spree in ToSho? Well, that’s where you are so… right mister! J’adored it, lapped it up, had me begging for more. And what did I come away with after my orgy of sleaze?
 

I learnt that lady Madonna is as gloriously foul and villainous as I had hoped.

I learnt that Guy and his friends are so deeply uncool they use the word poofter in a non-ironic way like old janitors in a 1953 Ealing comedy.

But the best thing of all? I learnt the phrase ‘I gave up my life to make you the evil queen you are today!’ and there’s a few people I’m just itching to use it on.

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More dolly #content:

5 comments to “Fag Hag Diary”

  1. I am SO going to enjoy watching this one unfold.

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  2. We always knew Madonna had a penchant for homophobes…

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  3. Yup. Ironic, non?

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  4. Oh no! Could Our Lady have actually contacted her brother to “write” this book and have it timed coincedentaly with all the current goings on about her marriage and tour? Kould Kristopher Been Kontacted By The Rabbi who is Kabballahing with Madge and her NOT NEW boyfriend A-Rod? Poor A-Rod had lunch in public with the guru and if you really want to distance yourself from something show up on an outdoor terrace for some impromtu, al fresco dining.

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  5. AT THE SITE LASURFPUNK.BLOGSPOT– ALSO LASURFPUNK HOLLYWOOD
    THE EDITOR DID AN OP/ED PIECE
    HE THINKS MADGE IS IN ON THE BOOK TO BOOST
    TOUR TICKET PURCHASES.

    HERE IS LASURFPUNK’S POST:

    LA*SURFPUNK SAID IT FIRST–I AM CALLING IT OUT!!!!

    I am receiving a lot of emails on the Madonna book…

    Here’s my thoughts sweeties….

    I have been following THE VORTEX since around 1981…..

    I am just going to say it and you can send all your friends here to say that I said it….

    MZ THANG is a master at manipulation….a master at controversy…..a master at marketing…

    JUST THIS YEAR ALONE OF THE VORTEX MAKING HER BLACK HOLE OF MONEY:

    APRIL 2008–HARD CANDY drops–all the press, all the ELLE covers worldwide, the SUNSILK ads

    MAY 2008–Tickets for SWEET AND STICKY go on sale

    JUNE/JULY 2008–Guy and her are splitting/ Chris’s book is coming out

    AUGUST 2008, after her b-day, STICKY AND SWEET TOUR starts

    So keep the above timeline in your head–

    THE VORTEX has sold OVER a million tickets for her stadium tours–

    Think about that—as WANDA SYKES says–let that marinate……

    1 mill at least…. at $325–at the least– a tix that is @ least $325 million–on the low end of a figure…..

    So she has the tour…

    …now all the rumors of Guy and her splitting–which she says is not happening….

    so all the columnist are writing about the separation in their columns but they always mention in their reports that she has a TOUR coming up–free press for the tour –right?….

    okay…now this book…..MZ THANG doesn’t have time to pen her book right now she is still LIVING LIFE and making new adventures to write about….

    ***HERE IS WHERE I AM SAYING IT……….. I DO THINK SHE IS IN ON THE BOOK–HEY SHE DOESN’T HAVE TIME TO WRITE A BOOK

    USE THE BROTHER TO WRITE ONE , MAKE IT SEEM THAT IT IS “UPSETTING”

    WHICH CAUSES CONTROVERSY–WHICH IS ONE OF THE VORTEX’S MARKETING TOOLS

    SO IT GETS HER FREE PRESS FOR THE TOUR

    See how it is one big circle for the tour.

    Then in about a decade she will pen her own book to “clarify” all that has been said and written about her—causing more controversy and what have you learned with LA*SURFPUNK’S op/ed piece on THE VORTEX:

    CONTROVERSY=SALES=FREE PRESS= MADONNA’S MARKETING TOOL!!!

    There I said it…she is in on the book and making it seem like she is “upset” meanwhile the book sells out, #1 on the bestseller list, blah, blah, blah…

    Chris and her are on their way to the bank= $$$$$$$$$!!!!!

    She always carps on and on –at least in her early years–that she has nothing to hide …she is an open book…

    well here ya go–a book that is about to be opened about a life that is opened and has been played out in the public since day ONE…..

    I love how she tries to act shocked now and this coming from the one rolling around on the floor like a slut at the MTV awards wearing a bride dress!!!

    or her naked hitchhiking on the side of the highway in LA for Herb Ritts while he is clicking away for her SEX book…

    QUIT ACTING SHOCKED–LADY!!!! I AIN’T BUYING YOUR ACT!!!!

    GIVE ME A BREAK–

    YEAH, SHE IS IN ON IT!!!!!!!

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