Honey, you two are simply PERFECT together!

We want these two to go out.

Yes, we know there’s a slight hitch in that both like what is known in the business as cock, but you can always go elsewhere for the sex.

Kim Cattrall and Rupert Everett are ‘ficially two of our favouritist people on the planet. Saucy, sexy, and a whole load of fun, the air would be rancid with bons mots and willy talk (often the same thing in our book), and they’d probably invite us round for tea, ’cause they’re nice like that. And having fraternised with both but separately (yeah, we know, but our mum reads this and it gets her through the lonelier hours) we can’t believe we hadn’t thought of match-making them before.

*has a Davina McCall, early career moment*

Oh, yes, they’re at Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week in Berlin. Also known as, ‘we’ve been given a whole bunch of free clothes on the understanding we turn up at their shows and look pensive from time to time’.