Poor old Barry Bulsara! Inocenti after all. Eight years of pooing in a bucket, being someone called Spider’s bitch and having to wear chambray over a wife-beater and all because… the public like their crimes nice and neatly solved. Preferably within 45 minutes, like an episode of Murder She Wrote – not counting ad breaks.
So when a suspect didn’t handily present himself at the police station all remorseful and saying, ‘It’s a fair cop, guv!’ they decided to arrest the local nutter. Honesty, how Plot One – I haven’t seen that denouement since an old episode of Hart to Hart. And even then they had the imagination to make it a gardener.
Or course, there are still some people convinced that it was in fact Bazza that carried out this extraordinary clean, professional hit (you’ll know them by that copy of the Daily Mail in their hand). And their reasoning? He idolised Freddie Mercury and Princess Diana.
Well, if those are grounds for incarceration, they better clear the cells to make way for half of Old Compton Street tonight.