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And they’re in… this year’s Strictly Come Dancing contestants, that is.

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Our boyfriend.

After decades of speculation, the final 16 taking part in this year’s Strictly Cometh Dancing have been revealed.

And in terms of bumming potential, it’s all about Mark Foster. In terms of mouthy-trout potential, it’s all about Jessie Wallace and Gillian Taylforth. In terms of hair, it’s all about Heather Small off-of M People and desperately in need of a career-resurrection, and in terms of the essential-for-PR-purposes GMTV presenter, it’s all about Andrew Castle. Oh and Jodie Kidd’s in the mix, randomly.

This is your complete list. ’Cause we know you’re pedantic like that. Oh and more Mark Foster tit-age:

The womens:

- Christine Bleakley (presenter, apparently. Us neither)

- Jodie Kidd (former supermodel. J’adore)

- Cherie Lunghi (actress. Excalibur. Kenco ad. Etc.)

 - Heather Small (M People. ‘Moving on up’, blah)

- Lisa Snowdon (inexplicably Britain’s Next Top Model and George Clooney)

- Rachel Stevens (small)

- Gillian Taylforth (’Stenders, The Bill, occasionally Loose Trouts)

- Jessie Wallace (’Stenders, etc. Hooray! btw)

The mens:

- Andrew Castle (GMTV. Guarantees coverage on the sofa every morning)

- Tom Chambers (Holby City. Or one o’ them shonky hospital shows. Cute, mind)

- Phil Daniels (actor. ‘Stenders. Another one. Oh)

- Mark Foster (hoo-bumming-ray!)

- Austin Healey (rugby player with car’s name)

- Gary Rhodes (hair and cooking)

- John Sergeant (political/newsy)

- Don Warrington (actor. Kinda familiar, but can’t really place)

Now for more of Mark Foster…

Nice tits.

Hand?

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User comments
Smalls
August 28th, 2008 at 3:25 pm

Mark Foster? J’adore.

Dolly Clackett
August 28th, 2008 at 3:35 pm

I inexplicably, and I mean that quite literally, have Jodie Kidd’s mobile number on my phone, I should text her and wish her well, break a leg etc - ooh, and ps - don warrington is of off kenco too - and of off Ms Jones of off rising damp of yesteryear

Peseta
August 28th, 2008 at 3:39 pm

It’s not for me to criticise the delightful Mark Foster’s body, but what is that, erm, inconsistency in his left tit (your right?)

Pilar Palabundar
August 28th, 2008 at 4:12 pm

Oh my, this is going to be a good one. But how many ex Stenders actors are in it this year?

Champagne for Lulu
August 28th, 2008 at 4:15 pm

107. And that’s not even including colleagues in the audience.

elsie tanner
August 28th, 2008 at 4:46 pm

Mark Foster. Hmmmm. He’s never had a girlfriend or any female companion, has he?

A Nolan Sister
August 28th, 2008 at 4:54 pm

Gillian Taylforth - how could you not mention that she is also off of Footy Wives (intersex baby saga etc).

Oh, that and having a gobble of her boyf on the hard shoulder of some motorway. Classy and brassy.

Champagne for Lulu
August 28th, 2008 at 5:18 pm

I love how we’ll never leave that noshing off her boyf on the hard shoulder thing alone…

Pilar Palabundar
August 28th, 2008 at 5:22 pm

I know, it’s not like we haven’t all been caught doing the exact same thing down the A10.

Smalls
August 28th, 2008 at 5:25 pm

I once did it at Knutsford Services. How very Victoria Wood.

stella polari
August 31st, 2008 at 8:07 pm

http://healingmedium.blogspot.com/

Elsie Tanner,
I know what you`re getting at, you gossip ! I had the pleasure of meeting Mark Foster way back in (around) 1991 at a male only garden party . I`m saying no more.

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