We can only assume our invitation was lost int’ post. The Royal Mail isn’t what it used to be *tut*

Wish you were here? Yes *double sulk*Last night saw Me-Me-Me ‘enjoy’ a mid-week rest from poll* dancing and amyl nitrate and we’re somewhat embarrassed to say our little tushes were tucked up in bed betwixt the hours of 10-11pm. This early night and sweet slumber meant that we woke up fair of face and positive of outlook and even did the washing up! It was Mary Poppins style and yes, singing along with some passing bluebirds was involved.

However, and it’s a big however, things positively soured when we read the news on our way into the work place. It turns out that while we dozed to a Dave re-run of something that wasn’t funny the first time we saw it let alone the third, professional pig in a wig Christina Aguilera (come on, it doesn’t mean we don’t love her, but the state of it recently!), Paris Hilton, Prince William and some other royal ladies (see what we did there? We suggested William was a lady *hee*) got down and dirty on the dance floors of London’s glittering Whisky Mist bar. *sulks*

So what the likes of Princesses Eugenie, Beatrice and the ginger one’s girlfriend Chelsy Davy were doing partying with Paris et all we don’t know, but tis said that when the moon is in its second phase in the month of All Hallows Eve, and Scorpio is rising in ascendance with Uranus, strange things happen. At least that’s what Russell Grant licked in our ear in Ghetto’s toilet a few weeks back. *shudder*

* Just making sure you’re paying attention. We – ahem – of course mean ‘pole’.

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2 comments to “We can only assume our invitation was lost int’ post. The Royal Mail isn’t what it used to be *tut*”

  1. I have many fond memories of the toilet in Ghetto. Thankfully, they do not include Russell Grant.

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  2. Poll dancing?
    Is that a straw poll or a metal poll?
    I want to know.

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