Why, sir, why?
Now before anyone gets all sanctimonious on our very back back-bottom bottoms, we’re not into taking the rap out of the under ages. Unless they’re cunts, and we’re led to believe this one isn’t. This one, in case you’re wondering, is a boy. Called Presley. He’s Cindy Crawford’s son. Do keep up.
And we’re not even going to take the piddle out of the fact that despite being a boy of *checks press release* nine, he looks like a girl. We too looked like girls at his age. Now we just look like ladies.
We would just like to know, via a Late Diana, Princess of Wales-shaped postcard, why he’s wearing a hairnet.
And while we’re waiting for the post to arrive, let’s do a compare ‘n’ contrast betwixt Cindy Crawford and her son. S’uncanny. Not surprising, admittedly – they share genetics and if our biology lessons taught us anything it’s that sex is between a man and a woman only, so help us baby Jesus – but it’s a fun thing to do all the same…
We’ve just found out, via extensive journalistic research, that Presley is wearing a hairnet ’cause he’s helping momma give food to the poors at some Thanksgiving thing in LA. Mmmmn, Health ‘n’ Safety.