While we’re here, what is with ‘Cycle’? As in washing machine cycle? As in same old format that comes out a more faded and rubbish version of its former self? – think that poor excuse for a towel that you sandpaper yourself dry with every day – Are we talking that kind of cycle?
In a word, no. Having given it much thought, we think this might be the best series yet. Tyra-Bot? Alpha-J? Beta-J? Last night ANTM went sci-fi and it was the most bizarre slash baby cheenius beginning to a series, like, ever. But what did we learn from the hour’s vegetative TV watching?
Well, there are three Britneys. To be fair, two of them spell if Brittany and one confused lass spells it Brittney, but still… there are three of them. Three.
There’s a Chinese/Korean/Home girl called Sheena who hails from Harlem and confuses us with her bling twinkle and street talk, but we have a feeling we might just heart her. Heart or hate anyway. It’ll soon become clear.
We enjoyed the persistence of Joslyn, who has apparently auditioned 30 times in the eleven series. Eh? We were also interested by the predatory nature of the ‘I like girls and boys, what of it?’ Elina.
And then there was Isis, the pre-op tranny that we’ve all heard about. So, we couldn’t help but have a long hard look when she did her bikini catwalk, but she was very well tucked put it that way and if she would just do something with those Uncle Fester eyes, she might just win.
What we mostly enjoyed though was her lack of interest in ‘representing’ the LGBT community when she really could have gone the sympathy route that all X-Factory contestants seem programmed to go. ‘My mum’s dying of cancer, please vote for me to become a pop star.’ And that will help her how?
Anyway, for thems what give a rose smelling shit, visit the LivingTV website for more of the girls. You can give them star ratings and everything *claps like a special*.