Fina-freakin-lly! ANTM Series 11 started on screens around the British Isles last eve, and can we say yes, yes and more yes

'Tyraaaa maaaaaail' *squeel*America’s Next Top Model has been absent from UK screens for a couple of very long weeks. It was way back in the dusty days of 2008 when we saw professional ham Whitney wobble her way to winning Cycle 10 and last night saw the beginning of Cycle 11. Yes, el.ev.en.

While we’re here, what is with ‘Cycle’? As in washing machine cycle? As in same old format that comes out a more faded and rubbish version of its former self? – think that poor excuse for a towel that you sandpaper yourself dry with every day – Are we talking that kind of cycle?

In a word, no. Having given it much thought, we think this might be the best series yet. Tyra-Bot? Alpha-J? Beta-J? Last night ANTM went sci-fi and it was the most bizarre slash baby cheenius beginning to a series, like, ever. But what did we learn from the hour’s vegetative TV watching?

Well, there are three Britneys. To be fair, two of them spell if Brittany and one confused lass spells it Brittney, but still… there are three of them. Three.

There’s a Chinese/Korean/Home girl called Sheena who hails from Harlem and confuses us with her bling twinkle and street talk, but we have a feeling we might just heart her. Heart or hate anyway. It’ll soon become clear.

We enjoyed the persistence of Joslyn, who has apparently auditioned 30 times in the eleven series. Eh? We were also interested by the predatory nature of the ‘I like girls and boys, what of it?’ Elina.

And then there was Isis, the pre-op tranny that we’ve all heard about. So, we couldn’t help but have a long hard look when she did her bikini catwalk, but she was very well tucked put it that way and if she would just do something with those Uncle Fester eyes, she might just win.

What we mostly enjoyed though was her lack of interest in ‘representing’ the LGBT community when she really could have gone the sympathy route that all X-Factory contestants seem programmed to go. ‘My mum’s dying of cancer, please vote for me to become a pop star.’ And that will help her how?

Anyway, for thems what give a rose smelling shit, visit the LivingTV website for more of the girls. You can give them star ratings and everything *claps like a special*.

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5 comments to “Fina-freakin-lly! ANTM Series 11 started on screens around the British Isles last eve, and can we say yes, yes and more yes”

  1. beam us up, firecely.

    my face hurt by the end.

    Sheena to win.

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  2. Wasn’t it wonderful? Tyra is an utterly insane evil genius. I love her, the programme and all the girls – including the two Js. And yes, Sheena was fab.

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  3. the level of ignorance amongst the contestants is shockingly high…. this can only mean gripping tv for the next few weeks.

    Tyra’s fierce-moose impression was just spellbinding. i’m still a little stunned.

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  4. This is a show about women wearing clothes, right? Radical.

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  5. nope. this show is ALL about Tyra Banks’ megalomania. ergo fascinating.

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