He has the whispy hair of a ‘love you long time’ hooker’s flange, little-to-no lips and a demon child on his arm, but how dolly-hot does Simon Cowell look in these 1979 holiday snaps?

Sailors braces? Check. Plunging neckline? Check. Elizabeth Duke necklace? Check.We say snaps plural because there are more. That’s it really. You know who the man is. You know he’s richer than rich. You know whether or not he makes you moist. So enjoy the pictorials over the jump. There’s one of his bottom you know. Oh and for the lunchtime rush, there’s a poll. *claps like a spesh*

Getting his tits out for the lads Not afraid of a stripe
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More dolly #content:

2 comments to “He has the whispy hair of a ‘love you long time’ hooker’s flange, little-to-no lips and a demon child on his arm, but how dolly-hot does Simon Cowell look in these 1979 holiday snaps?”

  1. I’d hit it.
    (What exactly does that mean, by the way? I’m not into violence in the bedroom…)

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  2. Think ‘hammer and tong’.

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