Got a shit chin? This’ll sort you out.

Hooray for chins!

A chin – much like a shoe – can make or break an outfit. If it sags – a la Ulrika-cunt-cunt Jonsson – or indeed if you just don’t have one – a la Gail Platt off-of Coronation Street – then it can be a bit of a bugger.

We imagine (for we have chins in this office. S’true. Some of them are even rather nice) that those who have shit chins gaze longingly at the chinly blessed of this world, and pray for the day when clever people who paid attention at school invent something that will magically grant them a jaw line to be proud of. The sort people take pictures of down to their plastic surgeon and say, ‘That one, please. And make it e-snappy.’ Some chins are that good, they get sent cards.

Either and/or the above, there’s a cream that a gent or indeed a bearded lady can use during the shaving process, that helps to tighten and tone the chin/jowl area. Which means you can get a hot chin without resorting to the Boy George method of painting your entire neck black (it’s thinning!) or indeed the Craig David-of-old method of growing a stomach-churning spindly line of stubble to give the illusion of a jawline (we ain’t fooled).

And how does Ultra Man Jaw Line Defining 3 in 1 Shaving Cream do this? It contains glaucine, which stimulates elasticity.

*falls off chair; bounces right back up again*

Can’t help yourself…?

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