Whilst it looks like there’s some nasty stubble rash going on round her lettuce, there’s no getting away from the fact that Mel B off-of lots of time on her hands, has spent rather a lot of that time grinding her body down to a BMI of 0, give or take a few digits.
And whilst we’d much prefer that gennelman caller of hers to wear something more appropriate – Speedos, say. White, with the lining cut out – there’s no getting away from the fact the Mel B is wearing hooker heels. By the pool. For which we salute her.
And, you know, great tits. And if we were Gok Wan, we’d say she looks ‘fierce’. But we’re not, thank the Baby Jesus and all who sailed in him, so we won’t.
*looks at empty packet of Digestives on desk; looks at stomach; looks at empty packet of Digestives again; looks at stomach again; weighs up pros and cons of bulimia*