Jake Gyllenhaal’s gone all Hugh Jackman on our ass! *imagines*

*squeezes tits; gets a slap*

The facts, in Ryvita Minis bite-size format (people, we’ve got a date with an Halloumi Salad ‘n’ hot gennelman who may or may not be into bumming. Like you can choose…) are thus:

– This is Jake Gyllenhaal.

– He’s been working out.

– For a.

– Film called Prince of Persia.

– We once had a Persian cat who was the cutest thing you ever did see. Face wasn’t too squashed, and he loved a little chat.

– Jake Gyllenhaal’s chest would now give a great tit wank.

– Wash your mouth out, then come this-a-way,-that-a-way to watch a clip-cum-interview-thing from which that still above is taken… *claps*

 

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4 comments to “Jake Gyllenhaal’s gone all Hugh Jackman on our ass! *imagines*”

  1. He’s so big his head now looks photoshopped.

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  2. I’d be the wank to his tits…

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  3. Tit wanks? I’ll tell your mum…

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  4. my my, how he has grown. I still see him as that young sexually confused cowboy, who had his first sexual encounter in a tent, when he was supposed to be watching the flock, not grinding Heaths Ledgers cock like a pound of veal.

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