a) We’re allowed to say ‘bender’ because we ourselves bend.
b) Bender rhymes with ‘Stenders, which is a moniker for EastEnders. Benders is another moniker for EastEnders. No end of fun. And fun rhymes with bum. And bumming is fun.
c) So there.
Backintotheroom. The hot new bloke in Easty Enders – Syed Masood (who totally got the looks in that family, mmm-hmmmmn) is to get his very own gay love storyline to have and to hold and to cherish and to bum.
Basically, he falls for Christian Clarke. You know, this fella.
*imagines; adds another for the sheer queer of it; (how Pam Ayres are we today?!); then another; then another*
Oh but wait, some losers have to go and spoil our fun. Or at least try and spoil our fun. The Muslim Public Affairs Committee are all in a tizz at the news, for fear it will besmirch the reputation of Muslims far and wide. Fry? Bigger fish.
‘There’s a lack of understanding of Muslims already, and I think EastEnders really lost an opportunity to present a normal friendly Muslim character to the British public,’ said Asghar Bokhari of the MPAC (really can’t be arsed writing it out again).
Er, ironic that you say ‘lack of understanding’. Pot, meet kettle.
Or, translated into the god’s/muhammed’s honest truth reads, ‘We don’t like gays.’
(And just a minor point in brackets; the rest of the Masood family are presumably not gay, and they’re ‘normal’ and ‘friendly’. Isn’t that enough, you greedy cunts?)
Oh and ooh, wanna know something else that’s ironic? The Muslim Public Affairs Committee calls itself the ‘UK’s leading Muslim civil liberties group’. So, civil liberty for you and you and you… just so long as you aren’t gay.
Word up, Muslim Public Affairs Committee (just rolls off the tongue, n’est-ce pas?) – Some Muslims Are Gay, Get Over It!