Pope United Colors of Benecunt the 16th has been taken to hos-pi-tal after falling. It’s thought he was taking part in his weekly bukkaki session, which he never fails to miss. He’s ever so good like that. He even wipes up after, which is not to be sniffed at.
The Pope – who sees things *makes crazy sign* – was on his jolly holidays in the Alps at the time.
The Pope – who always dresses to the left – also recently revealed, during a shock announcement, that he is a cunt. No one was listening at the time (too busy licking windows) so The Pope has subsequently decided to just go about his business – as per the job description – of doing as much harm to humanity as is humanly possible. And that, l’s and g’s, is called alliteration.
*curtseys; withdraws slowly so as not to scare the stupid people*