The Russians are coming! And they’re wearing nurse’s uniforms!

Fucking hell, Batman

The boot is well and truly going into Her Majesty’s National Health Service – cheekily known throughout the kingdom as the NHS – in the good ole U S and A. This lovely, slightly racist poster here has been produced as part of a campaign to discredit Jackie O’s brave new healthcare plan, by which – and if this isn’t communism gone mad then we don’t know what is – people will be able to afford to have healthcare. Burn him, we say!

Actually, we don’t. Because – and ask any Brit – everyone loves the NHS. It works, it’s brilliant and last time we visited a nearest/dearest in a very clean, very modernb hospital (actually more like a four-star hotel – not that we’d be seen dead in anything with that few stars) her next-bed neighbour had actually got himself transferred from a private hospital because it wasn’t as good (though we would like a bigger selection of sandwiches in the 24-hour buffet…)

So, American friends, while you face the barrage of misinformation about the benefits of a free health system – which we’ve had since our grandmothers were still shagging American GIs – from the forces of evil, bear these scenes and scenarios in mind.

1). Most personal bankruptcies in those United States occur because of unforeseen medical bills. That means not only is the ex-sickie living in a box, everyone he owed money to loses out.

2). It really is a very big weight off your mind if you can pop down the doc’s to check things you might not bother with if you had to pay for it. A lump on your ball? Nip down signor doctore and he’ll send you off for a test. No waiting, no worrying, no fee. Saves the country a mint in things cleared up in the early stages.

3). Everything from counselling to sex-changes to HIV medication to… well, everything is covered. Everyone pays a supplement on their taxes every week and if you still want to go private, then you can.

In short, it’s a genius thing that you really won’t find anyone criticising. Not anyone at all. So be suspicious of those interested parties over there trying to convince you it’s a short cut to communism. We have a Queen! How communist does that sound?

And now, if you would like to join us in a short prayer of thanksgiving for the NHS…

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6 comments to “The Russians are coming! And they’re wearing nurse’s uniforms!”

  1. Apparently Sarah Palin has called the Healthcare plan ‘evil’. What sort of twisted mind thinks helping people get medical attention is evil? She’s so sick, she needs a dose of NHS herself.

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  2. Read this: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/aug/11/nhs-united-states-republican-health
    …wherein Sarah ‘cunt’ Palin describes Obama’s plans as ‘evil’. Er, in what way is offering free health care to everyone evil, you stupid, igonrant, vile old cunt?
    They also refer to a whole bunch of misleading reports by teh American right-wing trying to bastardize the NHS. Seriously, wake up and smell the coffee, you retarded Republicans. Stupidity reaches new heights in the US. Who knew…
    *takes a valium*

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  3. Oh, sorry Bernard, just repeating what you said.
    Sarah Palin is Hitler in Nine West shoes…

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  4. Fucking hell, it really is like Cold War paranoia…! Jesus, get a grip, you loser Conservatives… progress is a good thing. It might even be the future.

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  5. Sarah Palin’s healthcare plan worked a treat. Her daughter got knocked up well before time. Way to go Caribou Barbie. Those protesting yanks need to get on a plane and see a bit of how it’s done around the world before judging Jackie O so harshly – maybe they wouldn’t sound so ridiculous then.

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  6. Oh it’s so embarassing to be a US of Amurikun these days–such a drop from the heady days of look-we-elected-us-a-smart-liberal-person-who-oh-look-happens-to-be-of-African-descent-and-all. Now we have rightjob nutwings screaming that the govamint will be killing yer grandma, and our President is so enraptured with the idea that everyone must love him that he spends half his energies trying to negotiate agreements with people who just pee on his shoes. And in the meantime we all die because our insurance conglomerate would prefer not to pay for the removal of that tumor thing, which we probably acquired prior to their knowing about it, thankyouverymuch. Heavy sigh.

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