Sex Degrees of Separation. Yes, ‘Sex’.

Oh look, it's Kevin Bacon

In between dishing out incontinence pads and happy pills, the people at Lloyds Pharmacy have been devising a calcumalator that can work out exactly how many people one has indirectly shagged. According to their report the average chap and chapess in the United of K has had naughties with 2.8 million people, which apparently makes us not the average chap or chapess.

Just fill in your sex, your age, the number of people you’ve bumped uglies with and their age (Age? Honey, we didn’t even get a name) and the horrifying statistics will be there in Lloyds’ patented green-grey and white.

Note to self/sluts, it doesn’t calculate over 50 shags because that would break internet and destroy the universe, so if you’re over the 50 mark, just assume you’ve fucked everybody known to man and/or beast, and stand in the corner and think about what you’ve done. *drifts off… ‘Memories, like the corners of my mind…’*

Work out your inner-slut on the Sex Degrees of Separation calcumalator.

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9 comments to “Sex Degrees of Separation. Yes, ‘Sex’.”

  1. I’m not a slut, but this calculation makes me feel like one. 6 million. Urgh! What happens if some of them were ugly?

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  2. Cher, if you’re slut, what does my 24,388,248 make me?

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  3. It makes you sore, Pilar.

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  4. Pilar’s a slut, pass it on…

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  5. Okay, my figure’s in… *drum roll, if you will*
    41,007,198
    My mother’s telling the neighbours as we speak.

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  6. 12,353,198. I’m covering myself entirely in this – http://www.me-me-me.tv/2009/09/25/when-all-else-fails-turn-to-hand-gel%E2%80%A6/ – while simultaneously swigging it. The horror.

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  7. Lulu, I always knew you would out-slut me. I take my pants off to you. Oh wait, that’s how I ended up with this number in the first place.

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  8. *curtseys*

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  9. 11,899,078

    I feel outrageous. Filthy and outrageous.

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