Obviously, Louis Walsh was already rubbing the precum around his entire glans region by the time they picked up the microphones on the very first episode of X Factory, but even we didn’t think he’d be so shamelessly after some young Oirish arse as to put these nasty, arrogant, tuneless twats through to the final 12. But then, as Cheryl quite hilariously said before they’d sung a note, ‘That’ll be a yes from Louis then’.
And so for the first time in recorded history (and hopefully the last) we find ourselves in sync with a whopping 97% of the readership of The Daily Cunt website when we say that they should not have got through: can’t sing, speak with American accents, are cunts and totally and deliberately sang over another contestant on this weekend’s show.
And while they were busy buttering Louis up, a rather talented and cute gentleman with not a bad voice was getting turned down by the when-we-last-checked talentless Will Young. Or was it Bruce Forsyth? No, it was Will Young and we know this because, despite the chin, he was wholly and utterly charmless.
See both ‘acts’ ‘performing’ over the ‘jump’. Sorry, jump…