DI Maggie Forbes is back!

Call me ma'am

Jill Gascoine, known to members of Her Majesty’s British Public Over a Certain Age as DI Maggie Forbes of The Gentle Touch and C.A.T.S. Eyes fame (think DI Jane ‘Helen Mirren’ Tennyson with a bubble cut and collars out to here) is back in business.

Yes, EastBenders business. She has emerged as the never-spoken-of and only-recently-invented-out-of-thin-air mother of Samantha J. Anus and that other Miss Piggy looking one. And she’s called Glenda. Which is already stretching credibility condom-thin.

Expect her to go wig-to-wig with Peggy Mitchell, cause a stir in the trousers of Jim Branning (sorry, but is it not tragic to see an actor who’s had a stroke playing a character with a stroke – very EEs though) and generally set a cat among various cockney sparrows (no doubt her daughters hate her so we’ll have to go through all that).

In a statement reported in The Daily Cunt a producer wittered, ‘I have a very clear memory of watching CATS Eyes every Friday night, while – to the fury of my mother – munching my way through an entire packet of Jaffa Cakes.’


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