It’s the moment we’ve all been waiting for…
*12″ scratches to a halt* Don’t you just hate it when things start with ‘it’s the moment we’ve all been waiting for’? Lame is what it is. We promise never to do it again. It’s all rather presumptuous too, non? What if only 82% of us are sat there, poised, twiddling our thumbs, semi…?
It’s the moment 82% of us have been waiting for… Sade’s new single-ette, ‘Soldier of Love’! We’re even looking at the cover of the January issue of Men’s Health and he’s quite obviously been waiting for it. In-between having his six-pack enhanced by a Crayola, a little arrow pointing to his brawny chest with the coverline, ‘How to Build a Chest She’ll Treasure! p15’, even though we all know the person most of the Men’s Health demographic will want to please is most definitely a he *pats hair, Mae West style-ee*.
So, ‘Soldier of Love’… it’s the first single from Sade’s new album of the same name, out 8th February. By which time we would’ve grown our hair out so it’s just like Sade’s, and gotten one of those nimble waifs on Hungerford Bridge to make us a pair of hoop earrings out of bits of old Coke cans. Diet Coke if we’re feeling fat, fat, fat.
Look, listen, feel if you will, after the break. It’s genius is what it is, and we can’t get the beat out of our head. Alongside the knowledge that ‘comedian’ Michael McIntyre is a pile of shite.