The UK of Great Britain’s entry for this year’s Eurovision will be penned (that’s ‘written’ in cliché-speak) by…
*drum roll; inhalation of poppers*
Off-of Stock, Aitken and.
Off-of Kylie Minogue and Sonia and Mel and Kim and Rick Astley and Bananrama and Hazell Dean and Donna Summer-the-latter-years and a whole lot of other ands.
Off-of we shan’t bother with the ‘even if we get Madonna singing a song penned by John Barry, produced by Berry Gordy and shamelessly whored around town by Simon Cowell, we still haven’t got a hope in hell with those pesky Eastern Europeans block-voting in their stone-washed jeans and acrylic blousons’ line.
In the meantime, let’s sing along to Sonia’s ‘You’ll Never Stop Me From Loving You’, then chuckle heartily at French and Saunders taking the piss out of her.
ps. If you actually go to the YouTube page for Sonia’s ‘You’ll Never Stop Me From Loving You’, someone has posted a comment reading ‘stupid fucking souser’ (sic).
pps. That’s a picture of Sandie Shaw off-of no shoes, up there. If we need to explain, get thee back to Eurovish school…