As if sleeping with Michael Douglas wasn’t bad enough, CZJ is now officially the world’s worst-dressed woman because of her dirty fur

Bah!

Fashion people wear what they’re told. We know that. Whether it suits them or not. Whether it’s ethical or not. Tell them what to wear in a magazine and that’s what they’ll wear. We’ve seen enough… let’s just call them trouts knocking around Shoreditch in fur coats to know that.

But when you are a star of the magnitude (and heft!) of Catherine Zeta Jones, currently starring on the Great White Way (not to be confused with the Great White Woman, which is she) in Sondheim’s A Little Night Music across from Angela Lansbury, you can wear what you like.

So why wear so much horrid fur? It’s not like you can get away with it adding all those extra pounds.

Anyways and hoos, the upshot (and no, they’re not shot: they’re treated much worse than that) of it all is that PETA, animal rights characters, have named her Worst Dressed Woman in the World. Put that in your pipette and smoke it.

Dishonourable mention also goes to Jessica Simpson, Kate Hudson, Goldie Hawn, Rihanna and Aretha Franklin. How many animals would it take to cover Urethra? It’s like a mink holocaust!

You are very bad people and will be punished. In Urethra’s case, that punishment began in about 1976. Oh, and while we’re mocking fur-loving assholes, jump the jump to see Dawn French send up Catherine Zeta Jones as the jumped up Welsh numpty she has become…

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5 comments to “As if sleeping with Michael Douglas wasn’t bad enough, CZJ is now officially the world’s worst-dressed woman because of her dirty fur”

  1. ‘like a mink holocaust’… Oh j’adore you three me’s….

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  2. What a daft bint.

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  3. ps. That could literally be my mother in 1982.

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  4. MfzXgiiV

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  5. Slaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag.
    She’s probably not, but it just seemed appropriate.

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