1. The Hurt Locker is one of the most boring films we have ever seen, and this from big fans of Point Break. We would have blown those arseholes up ourselves! Only we’d have done it in 3D.
2. Does anyone who ever plays a country singer have to get an Oscar? If so, can we put our names down to play Dolly (heck knows we play dolly most days of our lives).
3. Hooray to Sandy Bullock (that sounds like a resort, doesn’t it? Maybe a gay one where you can have filth in the dunes) for getting a ‘sexual orientation’ mention in her acceptance speech.
4. Love Barbra Streisand giving it away a split second before she announced Bigelow’s win with that little ‘At last!’ or whatever it was. Steal the scene, baby. Steal it. She sat next to Gerard Butler at the Governor’s do, apparently. Which shows taste and discernment.
5. Thank the baby cheeses Mo’Nique got her Oscar for Precious. Now, there’s a performance. Reminded us of our mum. And she was right about pig’s feet when you leave them to get cold.
6. Mel B Spice doing red carpet on GMTV not knowing who anyone was and calling Bigelow ‘Kathleen’.
7. Carla Romano on GMTV dropping Tom Hanks like a turd on a bun the minute Colin Firth walked into the room.
And, in a Ladies Television kind of move, what were YOUR Oscar moments?