So we started going through the list and decided to play the well known school playground game, ‘You have to fuck one of the next ten people’.
The winners were Thom Browne (an ‘h’ and an ‘e’. He’s out of control!), Robert Hanson off-of jeans, Justin Lance Black off-of writing Milk, then Perez Hilton came up and we actually real-life vomited, some bloke called Peter Thiel, Tom Ford and his hair, Marc Jacobs (you HAVE to, remember), Joe Solmonese (it must be fun to have a surname that sounds like an Italian fish dish), Neil Patrick Harris and his extended forehead, Anderson Cooper off-of silver fox and Ellen Degeneres. Just ’cause she probably misses cock.
Notable absentees include Thomas Cruise. Not to be confused with Tom Cruise, who is a whole other person. Not the same. Never.