Eating chicken *hiccup* makes you gay

You big lady.

This man, the president of Bolivia (who and a what and a where?), says eating chickens turns you into a shirt-lifting, turd-burgling, Mykonos-going, Shirley Bassey-listening, Shirley Bassey-impersonating, swollen goods-receiving, Abigail’s party-quoting kind of guy. He says it also turns you gay.

The rationale of President Evo Morales (we’ll be the judge of that) went as follows:

‘The chicken we eat is loaded with female hormones. So, when men eat it, they tend to deviate from their manhood.’

Pres Morales – who has clearly been chin-deep in a KFC Family Bucket since 1973 – was speaking at a conference on climate change. Naturally.

The rationale of Pressy-Lezzy Morales went on. It really did.

‘Baldness [really, baldness. You go to a conference on climate change and you get homosexuality and baldness. We demand a refund!], which seems normal, is a disease in Europe. Almost everyone is bald and it’s related to the food they eat. Among the indigenous people there are no bald men, because we eat different things.’

God help the *checks notes* Bolivians.

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5 comments to “Eating chicken *hiccup* makes you gay”

  1. I’d deviate from his manhood.

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  2. April Fools Day was 22 days ago!!!!

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  3. So says the Queen in a sash and oodles of jewellery.

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  4. **Shrieks in disbelief at the absurdity of this claim while raising chicken ‘faguette’ with pinky raised and the Evita soundtrack blaring in the background while thumbing through this months Vogue and considering going to Soho tonight to pick up an actual chicken** What utter tripe this Eva Mendes looking mother-fella is talking. What next, listening to Barbra, Judy, Liza, Bette makes you queer?

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  5. Only a gay man would wear that much jewelery. PORK eater.

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