Catherine Spartacus Zeta Douglas Jones has buggered up her makeup.

What are we looking at here exactly?

That’s according to popular opinion. We’re not ones for popular opinion. Popular opinion has it that Ant ‘n’ Dec are talented and Holly ‘Fat Tits’ Willoughby. Just Holly ‘Fat Tits’ Willoughby.

We hear you Catherine, la-di-da. We’ve started to get shags to sign disclaimers prior to entry, that there’ll be a moratorium for the first hour the morning after during which all judgement will be withheld until faces fall into place. Life’s tough. Tell everyone.

Any Highways to Heaven, what we’ve learnt from this story is that Catherine Zeta Jones off-of ‘Give us a cup of tea, Bronwyn, our mouth’s like a sewer’ probably shouldn’t wear red eye shadow, bumming can be perilous, you can never have enough hats, gloves and shoes, Holly Willoughby’s really rather a bit of a cunt and what follows is quite possibly Catherine Zeta Jones’s finest work to date…



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2 comments to “Catherine Spartacus Zeta Douglas Jones has buggered up her makeup.”

  1. Has Grandad been hitting her again?

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  2. Hi-di-ho, Campers! And a great big Yaki-Da to yeh … (-:

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