They wouldn’t dare – wouldn’t dare, we tell you. Wouldn’t. Dare. Dare. Not – mention it in their manifesto as the BBC is as beloved as kittens, fudge, bumming, alcohol and Kiehl’s products in this fair land. But the Tories are out to get Lady Beeb.
And last night was the first shot in what is going to get an ugly, slappy, scratchy, hair-pully fight. The bottom line is that the Conservatives think of the BBC as the UK’s version of communism. And that won’t do.
So, when Question Time, a highly regarded debate programme, where politicians and politically-minded folks are invited to face a studio audience (some frighteningly done out!) asked the Cons to put up a minister, what with this being Queen’s Speech week and all, the Cons wanted to know who else was on the panel.
When told it was going to be Alistair Campbell, one of the architects of New Labour, the Cons said that unless Campbell was pulled they weren’t going to play. Which is all very grown up and bodes exceeding well for the next five years where they will be looking after the nation’s interests in these tough times.
The BBC told them that it wasn’t for them to try and influence who else sat on the panel, that being the job of the broadcaster, to which they replied by pulling out their cheeks, poking out their tongue and blowing a giant raspberry in a debating tactic they have learned from Boris Johnson, highly respected Tory Mayor of London.
We give it six months before there are adverts on the BBC, Lorraine Kelly is chairing Question Time and Blue Peter presenters are wearing Enjoy Coca Cola T-shirts.