Adam used to be gay, now he’s ‘not’. Guess who ‘saved’ him? The LBJ.
Adam thinks that people ‘hate him temporarily’ when he starts vomiting on about the word of God and telling gays that they are an abomination. ‘Temporarily’, he says, because when we (yes, you in the shorty-robe!) see the error of our ways and lift the ‘weight of our sin’ off-of our big gay selves, we’ll thank him for it.
Oh no honey. We just think you’re a retard. Funny how as soon as you let Jesus in, you’ve got yourself a direct line to Nutsville. God’s PR department really needs to look into that.
‘People need the word of God,’ he tells himself (’cause we sure as hell ain’t listening, mmmm-hmmmn!), whilst mentally undressing that bloke with the musky scent on the subway and imagining what his cock will look like against his alabaster skin. ‘It’s the truth that sets you free.’
It’s a funny truth these people have, right? It’s the truth sane people called ‘made up’. Again, God’s PR people really need to look into that.
‘Homosexuality is an abomination,’ he continues, as his anus twitches. ‘It’s a sin that God will damn.’
It’s funny how these religious freaks just say things and think that’s enough. Ou se trouve le proof, Adam? We need a little something to work with here. And this is probably a bit much for Adam to comprehend, but the burden of proof is very much on your shoulders. Which are very homosexual looking, we might add.
We would also like to point out the scarf.
‘If they (we think he means us) stay in that sin, they will be damned to Hell – and rightly so!’ his feltch continues. Even though he’d really rather be the star turn in a bukakke right now.
Adam is very adamant, isn’t he? Wonder what vitriol he has for those who wear a nice pair of nylon tights? Do they get a Do Not Pass Go to Hell like us? What if it’s cold and they’re wearing two pairs? And what about the adulterers? What about the kids who get a bit lippy with their parents (we’re all getting stoned to death by the looks of it)? What about the elephants?
Ooh, but the best bit… If we the gays carry on being we and gayey, Adam says we’ll just have to be quarantined.
‘God’s just not having it!’ he says. Well God’s just gonna have to lump it.
‘It’s the most filthy way for the sperm to go,’ he says some more.
‘It’s literally filthy. It’s disgusting. It’s even, dangerous.’ (You totally have to see the way he says ‘dangerous’. 4mins31…)
At which point Adam comes in his panties without even touching himself. It’s a God-given skill.
And by the Highway to Heaven, can we just also point out the following:
– The strange growth under his bottom lip.
– The sybillance. It’s stripping the paint of our walls, goddammit.
– The fact that he’s a total dolly.
– The awful outfit, which is living proof of the myth that gays can dress.
– The fact that he’s a greedy bottom.
None of this makes him a homosexual, natch (okay, maybe the greedy bottom bit). The thing that makes him a homosexual is the fact that he likes cock. And so says the Baby G!
This man is not a homosexual. We repeat - this man is not a homosexual. ,