Do you get the feeling these Christians don’t like gays?

In with anger, out with love...

The Dove World Outreach Center, a bunch of retards who believe in fairies yet ironically hate gays (wha? Cha? Kha?), is planning a protest against the nice man who is the mayor of their town, Gainesville in Florida. Why?

*calls Mum*

Because he’s gay. But luckily, the kind, loving Christians down The Dove have given a heads up on why being gay is the worst thing in the whole wide world. It’s this… *licks nib of pen; then the nib of a cock* 

‘What is homosexuality? Detestable, indecent, wicked, offensive, perverted, shameful, unnatural, degrading, impure, foolish, godless, dishonorable, a lie…’

Well look who swallowed a thesaurus!

There’s more, just in case the message wasn’t quite clear.

‘We protest sexual perversion because the Bible protests it. Family, community and national leaders should also protest it, stay away from it, flee from it. What is acceptable to today’s leadership becomes acceptable to tomorrow’s society. We, as Christians, will fight for the truth of the Word of God. When Jesus came, he no longer supported the death penalty for these sins, but the wickedness of the acts remain wicked and a serious problem for society.’

Well thank the Little Baby Jesus Jesus came! We’d be on the gallows down The Tower otherwise. What on earth would we wear? 

And can you just imagine church gatherings down The Dove? You could cut the smell of poppers with a knife.

*phone rings*

That was Jesus. He said you’re a bunch of cunts. He also slipped us a tenner, told us to go treat ourselves. Something shiny. Nothing trashy, mind.

 

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3 comments to “Do you get the feeling these Christians don’t like gays?”

  1. If there is a god, he’d be ashamed of these Dove people. Not the same people in the Dove adverts, though, right?

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  2. I love Jesus when he’s bunging out tenners. I spent mine on poppers.

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  3. “The Dove World Outreach Center” — They are certainly a bunch of hateful cunts to have a such a nice name for their organisation. Sometimes I wonder who’s next. I mean, it was originally women. Then people of colour. Then gays. And when this is all over … who’s next? Special needs & the disabled?

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