Hello. Or, seeing as we’re feeling a little continental today, hello.
The people who try and make us feel our balls more have released their latest campaign to try and make us feel our balls more. They have scoured their little black book and come up with the cream of ball-owning famouses who have stripped down to their knackers in order to tell us that a) we shouldn’t be embarrassed to feel our balls (preaching to the choir, mmm-hmmn) we shouldn’t be embarrassed to feel theirs (preaching to the choir, mmm-hmmn) and c) the best way to feel one’s balls is to put your arms behind your head, tense real hard, and purse your lips a little.
The picture we have used as our primary example features ‘Dale Howard, Big Brother’ who is someone we’d completely, utterly, without question forgotten about until now. Now! Now…. *pause* NOW! Now? It appears that during the time he spent in the wilderness known as ‘gone and forgotten’ he had James Joyce’s Ulysses doodled on his right arm. Which is a book we’ve never had much time for. Modernist? We’ll be the judge of that. This time tomorrow work shall begin on Marcel Proust’s A la Recherche du Temps Perdu, on his left arm. In French, of course, in French.
After the break, you will find a few other pictures of famouses tempting us to feel their balls. Included are that rugby player lots of people fancy, the widower of Jade Goody (he is actually defined as ‘widower of Jade Goody’), and Adam Rickitt who is described as ‘actor/musician’, even though he’s just a silly Tory. Is there any other kind? There might be someone else. Can’t remember. Too many balls to feel. Oh, and the video of that scene in Embarrassing Illnesses where the rugby team get naked and one of ’em gets felt up by big gay Doctor Christian. All in the name of getting felt up.