She’d rather go naked than wear fur and she didn’t get no dirty diamonds off of no Liberian war lord! OK?

What these dirty old diamonds?

Poor old Nairobi and her problems with the truth, the whole truth, some of the truth, none of the truth, nothing but the truth or nothing LIKE the truth.

On Friday, Nairobi sat in very smart clothing in one of the most important courts in all the world and swore till she was blue in the face that she hadn’t flirted with Liberian baddie Charles Taylor and didn’t know the dirty diamonds were from him.

Today, Mia Farrow (looking much less smart! That hair, honey!) and Nairobi’s own ex-agent (one of the ones without an imprint of her mobile phone in the side of his head) have told the court that not only did she know full well where them dirty diamonds had come from, she was bragging about it.

Mia Farrow, wearing those very annoying John Lennon glasses of hers, said to the court that Nairobi ‘was quite excited and said in effect, “Oh my God, in the middle of the night I was awoken by knocking at the door and it was men sent by Charles Taylor and he sent me a huge diamond”.’

The plot thickens but doesn’t get any more interesting. Unless they can call someone really cool to the witness stand. Say Jane McDonald off-of Loose Women who can stand up and point to Nairobi – even though she’s not there – and declare that she saw her dancing with the devil.

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4 comments to “She’d rather go naked than wear fur and she didn’t get no dirty diamonds off of no Liberian war lord! OK?”

  1. Loving the idea of Jane McDonald at the Hague ‘Some of you may be aware that I live at home with me mother’ *legal types whoop and cheer*

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  2. Ooo … ooo … Jane McDonald can play Naomi in the musical of the events … in blackface … in Blackpool … hey, I’d pay to see that! :-p

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  3. when will they lock Nairobi up once and for all? really? the woman is a menace.

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  4. Antony, you really do echo my sentiments. Menace is putting it mildly!!! Can’t they reopen Alcatraz?!?!

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