‘At first I was a bit wary, but he’s not as bad as people think he is.’

Pig.

A small-to-medium boy with an accent that can be described using the words ‘Yorkshire’ and ‘peas’, was just on Her Majesty’s Radio the Second, relaying quite the fascinating anecdote about going to some field where the Pope was hate-mongering. 

‘At first I was a bit wary,’ said small-to-medium boy. Well, he actually said, ‘At firs ‘e wurr bi’ wuuuuri, wipe thy bloody feet, Fountains Abbey, peas,’ but we called Alan Bennett and he translated.

‘But he’s not as bad as people think he is,’ continued small-to-medium boy, his mouth full of half a pound of Jelly Babies.

So there you have it.

Out of interest, do you like this picture of the Pope, sporting the There’s Something About Mary white-wee look? It’s his absolute favourite. 

Out of interest, would you like to read the last paragraph of a piece about the Catholic Church meddling with Britain’s equality laws we wrote a while back? It was for one of those serious papers, so you might want to suck a Polo mint before you begin.

*clears throat*

‘It is hard to think of any group of people who have a weaker understanding of humankind, who propagate intolerance and ignorance with such zeal, who manipulate with such wizardry, who flaunt their ill-gotten gains with such pomp, who strike fear in places where there oughtn’t to be fear, who throttle the wondrous things that their God presumably gave us until they are rendered demonic, who are directly responsible for widespread pain, suffering and death. For these people to have sway with the British political system is anathema to decency. Now where is that Henry VIII when you need him?’

*sings Land of Hope and Glory*

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6 comments to “‘At first I was a bit wary, but he’s not as bad as people think he is.’”

  1. I got a lump in my throat reading that.
    Which is ironic because a lump in my throat is high on my agenda for this evening.

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  2. Am I the only person who looks at the photo and can only see Emperor Palpatine? “Your feeble skills are no match for the power of the Dark Side”

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  3. I hear ya Phil….!
    I do hope he wears his hair like this today at the Pope Protest. I’m sure I won’t be able to spot him otherwise.

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  4. Is it the ruby slippers he stole off Dorothy’s corpse that makes him so inconspicuous or the giant red leather throne he sits on to preach hate to the masses?

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  5. He’s not as bad as people think he is…………he’s WORSE!!

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  6. He is evil personified.

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