Now, we’re not as up on minority rights as we should be, but isn’t Cheryl Cole’s obsession with ‘little people’ a bit 19th century? What next? Bearded ladies and Siamese twins?

So having sent Simon Cowell some ‘musical dwarfs’ for his birthday celebrations, she’s now got Cher hanging out with this young man (don’t worry about the blood, it’s a Hallowe’en-related thing; Cher hasn’t come over all street on him).

Now, we’re not ones to come over excessively PC – unless it’s Police Constable, in which case we’ll get our truncheons out quick smart – but is it not offensive to use people as figures of fun? What was it the Elephant Man said? ‘I am a human being’? Just not seeing the funny side. For once in our lives!

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