Her Majesty Her Maj and comedy turn Prince Philip are on a state visit to the United Arab Emirates, which we’ve been told is not as awful as it sounds. All the same, poor bastards. Her Maj even had to take her shoes off to go into something or other. Anything for a quiet life.
Naturally, a few middle class morons jealous that they don’t have as much money as the royals are frothing at their eyeballs that Prince Philip made another gaffe (some say gaffe, others say ‘Give him a residency at the Apollo!’) – when doing a meet ‘n’ greet on street level with locals and expats, Prince P commented to some of the latter, ‘Why are you here? Are you running away from something?’
Now come on, comedy platinum that is. Micheal McIntyre would have sold 875,000 DVDs with just the ‘Why are you here?’ bit.
And after a grueling schedule of dodging wayward chiffon and smiling at shiny gold things, the Queen was presented with gifts (see above) by the president of the UAE, Sheikh Khalifa bin Zayed Al Nahyan. To which Philip can be seen whispering in her ear, ‘Well that’s thingy sorted for Christmas. You know, Edward’s one. Louise, is it? Mimi? John?’