Pass the Autumnal Shades with Aloe Vera as Oprah does her contractually binding boo-hoos on Piers Morgan.


Watch out, Americaninos, Piers Morgan is about to make everyone who appears on his show cry!

You may be thinking that this ‘hard-hitting man who asks the questions no one else dares’ is actually asking the questions everyone else asks, up to and including ‘How does it feel to be famous?’, but these celebrities will cry like babies as they answer. It’s just his thing. It’s what happens. It makes no sense at all to the viewing public and yet still it goes on.

Here, on his first American interview with Oprah Winfrey who has her own channel to flog (it’s called OWN, it’s everything you would expect), Opes – in between going, ‘Oh, you’re good. You’re good. You’re good,’ when he asks something incisive like, ‘Have you ever been in love?’ or ‘Have you ever bought Shake ‘n’ Bake?’ – gets asked about Martin Luther King, a subject so fresh and so upsetting it’s no wonder she uses it as her springboard to the waterworks. ‘Now you are going to make me weep,’ sayeth the Winfrey, who had protested that she wasn’t going to cry (until the clause in her contract was pointed out in a feed in her ear).

We also have a tear, right here in the corner of our eye. Or is it a plastic surgery wound that won’t quite heal?

And for any Americans wondering who the frick Piers Morgan is to be interviewing televisual royalty, he’s a one-time editor of a trashy British newspaper who got the sack when he ran some faked up pictures of British servicemen torturing Iraqis. Nice!

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4 comments to “Pass the Autumnal Shades with Aloe Vera as Oprah does her contractually binding boo-hoos on Piers Morgan.”

  1. Both Oprah Winfrey and Piers Morgan are utter dicks. I can’t even be bothered being eloquent where these two utter dicks are concerned.

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  2. I don’t think I have ever come across a more smug person than Piers Morgan and a less humble person than Oprah Winfrey.
    And I have come across lots.

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  3. did ya see me cry? real tears… no toobes or nuthin’….

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  4. The whole thing was a disgusting love-in. The bland meeting the bland.

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