This is Willow Smith in the latest Teen Vogue. Willow Smith is ten years old and already a cunt.
We’re not sure which one Willow Smith is, whether he/she is the one who whips his/her hair, but this particular brand of mister-sister has been working our reserve nerve for longer than is normally considered polite. And that hair whipping song, incidentally, is fucking shite. Age is no barrier to erudite criticism and he/she really ought to get used to it/its.
‘If I want to put on a pair of Converse with a pencil stuck through them, I will,’ reveals Willow Smith, as she nibbles a humble salad.
We once had a pair of LA Gear trainers with black and white shoelaces that we tied up to look like a chess board. We got mugged for said trainers on the back of a bus in a land far, far away called Manchesterford. True story.