So, they are going to let gays in Britain marry in church. Well, that’s the plan as put forward by the LibDems, even though most gays couldn’t give a flying finger of Fudge about the whole thing. Not while there are five-star hotels to get married in.
But while the Church of England is getting its knickers all up its nasty tight little backside at the very thought of it, saying that there’s no way they will allow the dirty gays to commit to a lifetime (well, a few years) of tax breaks under their roof, even though that roof has been subsidised with gay taxpayers’ money, those nice Quakers are already putting out flowers.
Michael Hutchinson, acting recording clerk for Quakers in Britain, said: ‘We ourselves see no distinction between heterosexual or homosexual in terms of commitment and wish to move further to allow legal marriage for same-sex couples, but this is a welcome step along the way to full equality.’
Now, while we can never condone the use of the phrase ‘we ourselves’, we do take our hats off (OK, they’re not the big, wide-brimmed bonnets the Quakers go for – we don’t have the hair to carry it off – but they’re still hats) to that sort of ‘what the hey’ attitude.
They marry divorcees in church, don’t they? And people who have had sex before marriage. And people who have coveted their neighbour’s ass when he’s been out there bending over doing the weeding and they’ve been having a Nescafe Gold Blend, all innocence, at the kitchen window. And ugly people. So why not the gays?
Not that we’d step foot in those spell-chambers ourselves, you understand. Not unless it was for a Coronation Street wedding…