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Which famous naked pop star is this naked on Twitter? Naked!


Is it Aretha Franklin? No, too pale.

Is it Diana Ross? No, she’d never get her hair in that helmet.

Is it Burt Bacharach? No. Just no.

Is it Mick Jagger? No, he’d never get his whole penis and balls in just one hand.

Is it Peter Andre? No, not orange enough and it displays a sense of humour which PA patently does not have.

Is it Cheryl Cole? No. She has much more body hair.

Is it Jake Shears? Yes. It is.

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And today’s hold music is a bum shot of Aussie rugger non-bugger, Nick Youngquest


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If you are a gay footballer in the closet and would like to discuss it, you can phone this man


His name is Anton Hysen, he is Swedish, he is a footballer, he is the son of some bloke who used to play for Liverpool and he is the only known gay in the whole of soccer! Lucky he’s such a lovely looking one!

‘There’s nothing to be a role model for – you’re gay, it’s not a big thing,’ says the head-screwed-on, ass-screwed-off (we’re joking!) 20-year-old. ‘People tell me I’m a celebrity now, and I shouldn’t be. But as long as it helps, I’ll do everything I can. If there’s anyone afraid of coming out they should give me a call.’

If we could have your number, honey, we are thinking of coming out and would love to discuss it maybe over a meal then drinks back at ours where there will be poppers waiting on ice…

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Now just look at the team spirit on that!


Up the blues! And that’s an order!

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That’s nothing. Our house looks like Diana Ross in the rooftop scene of Mahogany


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That is SO a good look on you!


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Oh, look. Jodie Harsh has Prince Charles’s gunk all over her lips!


It’s true! Prince Charles has a new lippy called Trust. It’s been developed by make-up artist Karen Alder and Jodie, along with the likes of Holly Valance, Kara Tointon off-of Easties, Jenny Falconer and KT Tunstall are all behind it.

The lippy comes out on 2nd April (that’s like Saturday!) and all moneys will go to The Prince’s Trust, which, Jodie informs us, helps 100 people a day… and Karen Alder, make-up artist to the stars (and Kylie!), was one of those hundred.

See ladies get stuff smeared on their lips over the jump… (more…)

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Vanity Fair has very kindly given Rob Lowe an advertorial for his new tell-all (we’ll be the judge of that) book. At least he had the decency to go topless.


Vanity Fair Rob Lowe

Rob Lowe – here seen wearing his Lego hair – is someone we’ve just decided falls under the banner of ‘whatever for?’

Okay, we didn’t just decide that… it was always taken for granted, but he’s so far off our radar that we’d totally forgotten he fell under the banner ‘whatever for?’ until he appeared on the cover of Vanity Fair at which point we remembered.

Sensory recognition, see.

Sure, we’d bum him. But that doesn’t mean we have to respect him.

*ends*

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