1. It will be a bunch of shite. Yes, it will. You know it will.
2. It is owned by the evil Rupert Murdoch.
3. Rupert Murdoch hates the UK. He thinks we think we’re above him. He’s right. We do. We’re right. We ARE!
4. You can’t make a big thing about getting rid of the News of the Screws when it was found to have hacked a murdered girl’s telephone, leading her parents to think she was still alive when she was already dead, and then just give it a new name and put it out again five minutes later. We’re not as stupid as that.
5. Just when we thought politicians had got round to standing up to this evil Batman-style villain of a newspaper proprietor, they’re all going fluffy on him again. A successful Sun on Sunday will prove them right to lay back down, loosen their clothing and apply water-based product to their nether regions.
6. Murdoch papers are right-wing propogandists intent on misinforming the working classes who should naturally be voting against right-wing interests. If that doesn’t sound too much like Evita.
7. The Sun has always been viciously homophobic.
8. People have committed suicide over stories run about them in the News of the World. It wasn’t ‘a bit of fun’. It was a life-destroying sleaze rag that would run ‘scoops’ of such national interest as vicars in knickers. Said vicar – doing no harm to anyone in the world – would then be so humiliated in front of his family and community that he would take his own life. Expect more of the same from Sun on Sunday.
9. It creates a culture of intolerance that we should not tolerate.
10. It’s shite. That needs saying twice.
10 reasons why you shouldn't buy the Sun on Sunday this *checks notes* Sunday,