Has the UK finally given up its Eurovision dream?


Well, you might think that, what with them/us having chosen a 75-year-old who hasn’t had a hit since 1972 and was never remotely cool in the first place to represent us. But maybe they know something we don’t.

On the upside, the record has, according to The Telegraph, been written and produced by ‘the team’ behind Adele and Lana Del Rey. Who that team would be, they’re not revealing, but we already have a distinct sinking feeling around the gunt area. But then we are the people who literally cried when Clodagh Rodgers came fourth back in the early 70s…

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4 comments to “Has the UK finally given up its Eurovision dream?”

  1. Wasn’t aware Adele and Lana had a “team” in common….other than the gays, of course. I blame Ann Widdicomb. Surely she was the entire judging panel. It’s the only explanation

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  2. Apparently he’s still big in Eastern Europe so perhaps he’s our best chance for years…

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  3. We’re never going to win *says something insulting about Eastern Europe*, so we may as well treat it as a comedy. Send the most ridiculous person imaginable. It’s a very British thing to do.
    But ironically, we probably do stand our best chance in yonks. We’ll get the ironic-cool vote. And the granny vote. Do grannies vote?

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  4. We’re doooooooomed. It’s like they don’t want us to win.

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